like this T-shirt:
Adorable Girlfriend over at Republic of Dogs already ranted about this (after spotting one being worn in the wild). What I find funny is that wearing a T-shirt like this almost guarantees you won't get a chance to "take a look" with any woman. The back may as well say, "P.S., Want to come back to my Mom's basement and watch me beat off into a sock?"
It also reminded me of the T-shirt I was wearing when I met my wife: a black Cure concert shirt from the Kiss Me, Kiss Me, Kiss Me tour. The front had a giant fluorescent image of Robert Smith, sporting full medusa hair.
Some of you may say, But Brando, that kind of shirt is not heterosexual enough for me. Well, let me finish with the moral of the story: soon after being spotted in that shirt, I no longer needed the sock.