Friday CJ Random 11

It's one more random than 10!

It actually hit 50 degrees this week, which made me feel like dancing. Let’s see if the CJ list can keep me on the floor....

1) “One More Time,” Daft Punk. Okay, it’s hard for me to dance before I’ve had an ounce of caffeine, but God bless Daft Punk for trying. I wish I could talk like the vocals in this song, which are very processed and use a staccato delivery that enunciates every syllable. Hell-o, I am Brand-o. Woul-d you li-ke to dis-cuss th-e bro-chure cop-y o-ne mo-re ti-me? Oh yeah, all ri-ght, may-be lat-er when you'-re fre-e!

2) “Feels Like Rain (Live),” John Hiatt. I saw him on the tour when this was recorded, but he didn’t use our show for this CD. At the beginning, you can hear this one guy going, “Wooooo!” I would love to have a live CD where my hooting got recorded. I would share it with my nonexistent grandchildren. “Look kids, your grandpa used to be young and spunky, before he felt the icy grip of death around every corner.”

3) “I.O.U.,” The La's. Kind of a skiffle-ish tune, but I don’t hear any washboard. I gotta have more washboard, baby!

4) “Transport Is Arranged,” Pavement. Begin quiet, chiming, lazy guitar notes...Add half-asleep vocals...Remain slack for the first half of the song....Now, over the horzion, here it comes...The crescendo...Closer...Wait for my command...COMMENCE ROCKING! Keep rocking, boys! Okay, cease rocking! Resume laid back motif so this doesn’t seem like two discordant music ideas...Congratulations, you have completed your Pavement song construction training.

5) “I Want You (She’s So Heavy),” The Beatles. Lennon makes it clear that he wants her, and in fact, wants her so bad. And the group ascertains that she is so heavy. But they never explore this further. Does he want her because she is heavy? Or does he want her, but cannot obtain her because of her heaviness? And what is the nature of her heaviness? Is it weight, or does she have a super-dense molecular structure that prevents him from getting close to her lest he be crushed by her density? When you have 7:39, you need to answer these questions, not just explore the studio space with Hammond organ fills and Ringo.

6) “Wednesday,” Drive-By Truckers. A band name that perfectly fits the band. This is a nice, uptempo number that doesn’t dive headfirst into poverty, desperation, bathtub meth production, or Lynyrd Skynyrd as much as the band usually does.

7) “Town Called Malice,” The Jam. Goddamn you, Billy Elliot. This is a great song that now always makes me think of a troubled English lad dancing. Dance, Billy, dance!

8) “Take a Look in the Mirror,” Toots and the Maytals. Everything sounds better with a Caribbean accent. That’s why people could listen to Billy Ocean without getting out of their cars and getting into the radio stations to slay the DJs that played Billy Ocean. This Toots song is 1/Billy Ocean, which is a very large, positive number.

9) “We Looked Like Giants,” Death Cab for Cutie. A very good song about having sex in a very small car. Paradise by the Yugo lights.

10) “Beating Around the Bush,” AC/DC. Nothing makes my morning like Bon Scott double-entendres. It’s not quite “Big Balls,” but what could be?

11) “Mirrorful,” Jawbox. The great thing about the major label race to sign alternative bands like Jawbox in the 90s, only to then not know how to market their albums and let them wither on the sales vine, is that people like me could later get albums like this for $.99 from Columbia House.