Monday, May 01, 2006

It's nice to know that after one year of jerking, Powerline is still the worst blog on the Internet

It was one year ago today yesterday that I started this blog as a way to procrastinate on writing a novel share the comedy routines I was telling the pigeons at the park. I started with Quentin Tarantino's Julius Caesar and things went steadily downhill from there.

I appreciate everyone who comes by and checks out the blog, including the people I know who have to read it so they can answer my weekly, drunkenly slurred quizzes ("What kinds of animal is Bush using to eat the Mexicans? Answer me!"), and the folks I've met virtually who also keep some awesome blogs themselves. I also have to give special nods to Michael Schaub at Bookslut and Ginmar for driving all kinds of traffic my way.

What's in store for Circle Jerk at the Square Dance II: Electric Boogaloo? Besides lots of breakdancing? Well, hopefully more regular blogging, assuming no goddamned tornadoes hit my house again. There's plenty more where Cheney Devours Puppy came from.

I also have to thank the right wing for giving me so much to work with, and as if on cue, Powerline once again delivers my punchlines on a silver platter. Over the weekend, John MoonrakerHinderaker, aka Der Rocket im Hiney, wrote this ditty about Steven Colbert's appearance at the White House Correspondent's dinner. I decided to funny it up a bit by channeling the spirit of Bob Dole:

The annual White House Correspondents' Dinner is always a news story of sorts. This time, there was buzz about the fact that Joe Wilson and Valerie Plame would be there. They did indeed show up, but didn't seem to figure in any news. Commentary this year focused on the comedy: President Bush showed up with a look-alike version of himself who uttered the President's real thoughts while Bush stuck to the platitudes. The routine, which was funny, was well received.

The big news story was that the featured comedian, someone named Steve Colbert, apparently bombed. He did a virulently anti-Bush routine that got few laughs. Hot Air has good footage of both routines; you can judge for yourself who was funnier.

John Hinderaker wasn't surprised by this, inasmuch as John Hinderaker had never heard of Steve Colbert, and it's been a long time since John Hinderaker heard a political humorist who was very funny. Comedians, in general, don't seem very funny to John Hinderaker nowadays. For that matter, neither does politics. If you want to take a break from current events and remind yourself what it was like when comedians had no agenda other than being funny, check out this clip from the Jack Benny (ed: Jack Benny! Sweet fancy Moses!) show on Power Line Video.

And conservatives wonder why Hollywood doesn't market to them...

Daily Kos posted the Colbert transcript (thanks Grendel), and I can see why someone lodged with room-temperature IQ minority that approves of the President would not be happy with Colbert's truthinees. For instance, here was one of Colbert's jokes:
In fact, Ambassador Zhou Wenzhong, welcome. Your great country makes our Happy Meals possible. I said it's a celebration. I believe the government that governs best is the government that governs least. And by these standards, we have set up a fabulous government in Iraq.

I guess Hinderaker was expecting more Joy Luck Club than Friar's Club. He's just lucky Jeffrey Ross (scroll down) wasn't there, otherwise he might have heard: "Condoleeza Rice? I wouldn't shoot her in the face with Dick Cheney's colostomy bag."

Here's to another year of conservative cluelessness. Without it, I'd be making comedy bricks without straw.


Adorable Girlfriend said...

Conservative blogging is like a zipless f#ck. AG still doesn't get what you truly mean by either. And when AG says that, just know, it's AG talking.


Pinko Punko said...

Happy 1 year, buddy. Good stuff. We sure 'preciate tcha.

blue girl said...

Happy Blogoversary, Brando!

And, oooh! oooh! I know the answer!!

Giant Immigrant Eating Eagles!!!

Adorable Girlfriend said...

Um, BG, can we get some cake action here?

I know AG is busy, um well, she's busy and just leave it at that. You'll all be happy to see what AG has in her bag of tricks.

Brando said...

Many thanks. It has been fun. As I long as still make myself laugh while writing this stuff, I'm going to keep at it.

blue girl said...


Do you sit there and crack yourself up as you are writing your posts?

I do! My friends told me they can tell.

Nothing more fun that cracking yourself up -- that's what I say.

All hail the self crack up situation!!


Brando said...

All the time, BG. Not necessarily out loud (although I laughed the whole time while writing Cheney Devours Puppy), but it's my barometer for a post. If I don't find it funny, how can I expect someone else to?

I am, of course, often the only one who finds something funny, but that's good enough for me.

PJB said...

Happy Birthday. Having your blog title in my blogroll has made for some interesting hits via Google.

Brando said...

PJ, you should try having it be your blog title! One of these days I'm going to do a Site Meter post about what shows up there.