Tuesday, January 08, 2008

Top Ten Tuesdays: Why are we choosing our candidates?

Special extra desperate negative campaigning edition!

12) Going with what the Magic 8-Ball said.

11) Seems like a guy we could have a beer with, unlike that other asshole we thought we could have a beer with back in 2000.

10) Only name recognized was the guy who was on TV, on that show, the one with the crimes.

9) Well, I was going to stand for this one fella, but then Floyd said if I did that, I was dumber than a sack of pig poop, and I thought that was a pretty convincing argument, so I stood for the other fella.

8) Like a candidate who has the conviction to stare a mountain of scientific evidence in the eye and say, “I’m sticking with Genesis.”

7) Really seemed like he was for change, which resonated with us because we’re homeless.

6) Want a candidate who understands the plight of the rich lawyer with a guilty conscience.

5) Love the way he talks tough out of both sides of his mouth.

4) Can use his magical pixie powers to make federal deficit disappear in his pocket.

3) Believe it is time to put someone with breasts in the White House, and Huckabee’s out since he lost all that weight.

2) Uh, 9/11? Anyone? No?

1) Picking the one with the hottest ass.


Anonymous said...

11. Would go to a Genesis concert with BG and BP.

12. Can win the RoD annual bake-off.

Jennifer said...

13. Voting for the one who walks like a woman and talks like a man.

Anonymous said...

14. Because every time I hear his name, I think of Lee Adama.

Kathleen said...

15) throwing darts at their heads. Literally.

Distributorcap said...

he/she is the next Bush

fish said...

12. Can win the RoD annual bake-off.

This has been proven to be an impossibility.

Churlita said...

I work with a woman who says she can't vote for Huckabee because he looks too much like his wife. I could think of a million better reasons than that.

Brando said...

12. Can win the RoD annual bake-off.

This has been proven to be an impossibility.

True. I believe the Supreme Court will have to get involved this year.

Churlita, that is really funny.

Anonymous said...

16) promises to invade Antarctica as the first front in the War on Global Warming.

Anonymous said...

Brando, you don't know how true the Supreme Court thing is given the crap that has gone with the bake-off. Seriously, can't we all just get along?

Except with that jerkface traitor Fish!

Anonymous said...

"Waitress in the Sky" is a great song .

Here's my album

Nobleness of Another Person
by 33rd Golden Globe Awards


(In case that ^ doesn't show , it's a blank white page , with the the following in neon royal blue :"FLICKR is having a massage "