Wednesday, September 27, 2006

Top Ten Tuesdays: What are we demanding the public release of?

Special extra day late edition!

11) Classified President’s Daily Brief entitled, “Shit Determined to Strike Fan”

10) Original Star Wars movies that haven’t been fucked with by the guy who thought Jar-Jar was a good idea.

9) Paris Hilton’s health records (please hurry, it really burns!)

8) Spine of Democrats.

7) Government geophysical survey revealing increase in global warming caused by Bush’s excessive flatulence.

6) Genitals (guys in raincoats only).

5) Bloopers and outtakes from Abu Ghraib (with narration by Dick Cheney)

4) K-Fed (into space).

3) George Allen’s novel manuscript, The Bigot’s Guide to Hunting and Fishing.

2) The Tribulation (Christians only).

1) Common sense.


scruffylooking said...

How many trees would have to die in order to print out Paris Hilton's health records?

Brando said...

So many that even clear-cutting lobbyists would go, "wow, that's a lot of trees."

Anonymous said...

I would also like to know where exactly Monica bought that blue dress that fateful day back in the 90s after she watched 90210 the night before.

Anonymous said...

Spine of Democrats.

Boy, me too. I'm hoping Bill Clinton's wild Fox News Rampage® inspired some spine stiffing on the left side of the aisle.

I was just also pondering this idea...

Maybe the Democrats just need to start acting like the Republicans are irrelevant. Like totally irrelevant. Don't ever even give one piece of respect to anything they say. Be big jerks. Act like big jerks. Smirk a lot when someone asks them about some lame brained Republican move. Just act like they're history.

Know what I mean? I don't know if I'm explaining it well.

Cheryll said...

Wow, I thought I was the only one who can't stand Jar-Jar. I loved the movie settings, wouldn't mind living in that wonderful city -- but jeez, I left in tears over the big J. Everybody told me I over reacted. Didn't much like the hyenas in Lion King, either...

Oh, well. What's female for curmudgeon?