Tuesday, June 06, 2006

Top Ten Tuesdays: What are getting for Anna Nicole Smith's baby shower?

America’s favorite white-trash billionaire-corpse humper announced she is pregnant. What will we get her for shower gifts?

10) Hooked on Phonics

9) Complimentary exorcism, just to be sure

8) Free baby pole-dancing lessons at Montessori daycare

7) Baby Bjorn carrier with airbags for when Mommy falls down

6) Psychotherapy savings bonds

5) A special version of The Little Engine That Could, where the Little Engine waits for the Big, Old, Rusty engine to croak so the Little Engine can get all his coal

4) A breastfeeding funnel for the poor kid

3) Foster care with a loving pack of wolves

2) Snortable pre-natal vitamins

1) Starring role on a new reality show, Mommy Worstest

5 comments:

Anonymous said...

Love #5 Brando!

You know, most guys I talk to say that Anna deserved that guy's money. That they *made a deal.* -- and he knew the deal.

Whatever. I can only think of it so much before my head explodes.

She's is a total piece of work. A beautiful, beautiful face -- but, a complete whack job, if you ask me.

Ever see her show? OMG!

TJ said...

I'm a big fan of #6. Very funny. There's a cottage industry just waiting to be built.

Also, I'd laugh at #1 if it weren't so frighteningly possible.

Brando said...

I really think that show was the worst show ever. Trainwreck is being too generous. I hope she gets some of that money just so she'll never have to work as an entertainer again.

TJ, I saw there's a reality show coming out about Gene Simmons being a dad. So anything is possible.

Anonymous said...

I have never seen the show. I couldn't stomach that. This is good stuff, as always Brando!

teh l4m3 said...

How about a papoose made from the skin of Bobby Trendy? You could hot-glue-gun maribou trim onto it or something...