10) Dropping “g’s” From Words Ending in “ing” so as Make the Executive Branch Sound More Neighborly and Such.
9) Preserving Stem Cells as Caviar for the Vice President’s Office.
8) Enabling the Federal Emergency Management Agency to Relocate Disaster Victims by Catapult.
7) Requiring Transportation Security Administration to Perform Full Body Cavity Searches on Anyone Who Looks a Little Dark.
6) Mandating That All Books Must Have Cliffs Notes or a Movie Adaptation That Bypasses Actual Reading.
5) Allowing the Drilling of Baby Seals for Oil.
4) Permitting National Security Agency Employees to Interrupt Phone Calls to Ask People to Speak More Clearly.
3) Renaming the Phrase “Global Warming” in All Government Documents to “Freedom Heat.”
2) Altering American Foreign Policy to Comply With the “Suck It” Doctrine.
1) Establishing Federally Protected Status for Caucasian Males.
8 comments:
The only thing my mom doesn't like about Obama is his tendency to drop his "g's." I hope he gets over it now that the populous has spoken!
Prohibiting sharp objects at the White House dinner table.
Presidential Brush Clearing Season.
Looks like Righteous Bubba finally got his Janus thingy into the Google Word Verification: the word right here is "bonerme"
True Story.
Did you see Sarah Palin got into the Urban Dictionary?
1. Palin
1. An applicant lacking even basic job skills
2. Someone supremely un-self-aware or lacking any relative sense of what he/she does or doesn't know.
HR sent me another Palin for the marketing manager job.
2. palin
(v) to abandon one's principles for short term gain
Tom, a devout vegan, palined when he consumed a happy meal solely to obtain the collectible toy it contained.
weak flip-flop spineless mettle character
....And so on.
Remove Halliburton as #1 speed dial on all Whitehouse phones.
Is it sad that I can no longer read political stuff now that my 8 year nightmare is almost coming to an end?!!
Though, I'd like to discuss when we are revoking visas now that I got someone who will listen to me in DC. Oh wait...
Hilarious.
i am so looking forward to this break from politics
Post a Comment