Tuesday, July 01, 2008

Top Ten Tuesdays: What covert operations are we using to destabilize Iran?

10) Replacing Iran’s yellowcake uranium with Sara Lee pound cake until their nukes explode with flavor.

9) Sponsoring new reality show, So You Think You Can Overthrow the Iranian Government?

8) Smuggling in Chuck Norris’s beard under a burka so it can take out the entire Iraninan government with one whisker.

7) Disgracing President Mahmoud Ahmadinejad by digitally inserting him into famous pictures from Israeli history.

6) Shipping in bacon cheesburgers, Krispy Kremes, and PlayStations until Iranians are too fat and sluggish to promote terror.

5) Sticking bananas into the tailpipes of their tanks.

4) Hiring Fidel Castro to consult on how to assassinate heads of state.

3) Jamming all Tehran broadcast transmissions with Mind of Mencia reruns until Iran nukes itself.

2) Designing a transportation infrastructure completely dependent on fossil fuels and totally ignorant of fuel economy, until Iran has no choice but to expend all its time and energy invading countries for their oil!

1) Getting the Iranian Supreme Court to make George W. Bush the next Iranian president.

22 comments:

almostinfamous said...

but that (#1) is what you suggest as a solution to EVERYTHING...

Churlita said...

Won't #1 result in #2 anyway?

Grendel said...

Maybe my favorite list of all time.

fish said...

#3 has been banned by the Geneva Conventions so we really shouldn't use it.

Stop laughing. I mean it. I wasn't joking.

Noelle said...

Seriously, no one but Atkins-diet freaks could possibly be scared of something called yellow cake. That was really the best name they could think of?

Adorable Girlfriend said...

Apparently Fish is an expert at banning.

#42. Put AG in a tight bikini with new summer body (read: lost 15lbs and still going at it) and her Star of David hanging from her neck on a tank and role her in...

fish said...

Put AG in a tight bikini with new summer body (read: lost 15lbs and still going at it) and her Star of David hanging from her neck on a tank and role her in...

I've seen that movie.

Jennifer said...

and role her in

Where in the hell is BP?!?

Adorable Girlfriend said...

AG is far prettier than Lori Petty.

Role, not roll, was purposely used. He loves when AG plays with his mind on that.

Plus he's busy eating pork dogs or whatever those crazy WI peeps eat and listening to bands that he is too kewl to be listening to.

Mandos said...

AG is one to complain about banning. Hmpf.

Chuckles said...

#11 Sending them pictures of Chuckles' wang.

A little retro but necessary.

Adorable Girlfriend said...

Mandos, what are you talking about?!!

Mandos said...

My muffled "m"-based contributions to RoD as Redacted Mandos and Censored Martyred Mandos keep mysteriously vanishing and not reappearing.

If it's not you, then one Kevin W. Baker hates me for my freedoms.

Adorable Girlfriend said...

Mandos, you are just talking the crazzZZZy. A little less Kool-Aid will do you some good.

billy pilgrim said...

17) Spending all my time and my last available cash at Summerfest drinking beer and ogling the pretty people.

It works, trust me. Iran is destabilizing as we party.

18) not bothering to correct spelling errors on the Internets. Although I am aware of all internet traditions, this really cheeses the mullahs.

Adorable Girlfriend said...

Billy, there are pretty peeps in WI?!!!

You have seen Ann Altmouse, haven't you?!!! A fine, fine, WI type.

billy pilgrim said...

we take no responsibility for AA

She does like her alcohol tho

billy pilgrim said...

But everybody is pretty at Summerfest....

Adorable Girlfriend said...

Sure, because your drunk ass has on the beer goggles.

Distributorcap said...

#1 is the best suggest yet!

billy pilgrim said...

AG is jealous and needs something....

Adorable Girlfriend said...

Yeah, a nice Jewish doctor with a big vocabulary.