10) Halting all national security policies until Jack Bauer starts telling us what to do again.
9) Making our ad libs completely spontaneous.
8) Using down time on the set and training in method acting to really nail new role as a drug mule.
7) Looking under couch cushions and drink coasters for Netflix DVDs we've had for seven months.
6) Going blind after drinking the comedy bathtub gin of Frank TV.
5) Discovering mysterious polygonal objects filled with words that make a TV show appear in your brain.
4) Going into porn.
3) Creating a new type of reality show that requires no scripting.
2) Offering blood sacrifice to smiling TiVo god.
1) Spending an evening interacting with family, asking them how they are doing and listening to their replies and OH GOD PLEASE BRING TV BACK THIS IS KILLING US!!!!
BONUS: How are we coping with the stagehand's strike?
Paying $7.50 to watch two bums fight on Broadway instead of paying $75 for Broadway musical about the exploitation of the homeless.
3 comments:
Bumvertising?
Getting down on my hands and knees and thanking the flying spaghetti monster that I am no longer working in film & television, because the only thing worse than being a PA is being an unemployed PA.
Conversely, feeling really bad for my brothers and sisters working at the Broadway theatre concession stand. Once a concessionier, always a concessionier.
Oh no. You just have to play even more video games. Take it from me, you can just as easily avoid talking to your family with that distraction. If only I could bring the XBox to my aunt's house for Thanksgiving...
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