Special extra we're so old today edition!
12) Tapping foot to signal the next stall that we’re ready for a birthday spanking.
11) Wishing that Scarlett Johansson would leap out of the cake.
10) Watching Mr. Burns leap out instead.
9) Arranging naked detainees to spell Happy Birthday.
8) Having leather mask unzipped for the whole day.
7) Receiving thoughtful extra kickback from Halliburton.
6) Unwrapping subpoena from grand jury.
5) Drinking an Old Style for every year we’ve lived.
4) Getting treated for severe alcohol poisoning.
3) Popping two Viagra and cruising the retirement home for widows.
2) Looking over shoulder to see if that’s a breeze or the icy grip of Death.
1) Being as horrified about our new age as Dante was about the same number in Clerks. (severe profanity alert)
And just to clarify things, yes, I am another year closer to death today....
12 comments:
13) Watching episodes of The Andy Griffith Show and commenting on how young Aunt Bee looked.
(true story)
14) singing 'happy birthday' in Spanish and Farsi to prepare for eventual invasion of US.
15) Identifying the new joints that ache when the weather turns.
having Jenna and not-Jenna pop out of the cupcakes
16. Cranking up the volume on Matlock and falling asleep in your L-Z Boy.
Happy Birthday, Brando! And many, many, many more....
17. Looking forward to belated birthday wishes.
18. Finding a Jewish Doctor for AG's birthday gift!
I'm sorry I didn't post for you. I totally forgot your birthday was today. I feel like a bad blog mother. I always remember all the blog kids birthdays and I failed you.
Can I mail you a Buttercup Cafe cupcake? Actually, we could have mailed you and TLB a Junior's cheesecake over the weekend. They now have one in Times Square!
Happy belated!
Thanks for the b-day wishes. I had a nice one. You can never go wrong with a nice dinner and good Scotch.
AG, no problemo, you had your hands full with Chuckles. Not that your hands were...never mind.
I still feel really really bad.
And you know AG never feels bad. You have seen how I talk to folks on the blog?!
Maybe we can do a 1/2 birthday post for you. I am going to have to think up something special.
glad to hear it was a nice birthday!!
last year on my birthday I fell and sprained my ankle and went to the hospital where I caught some germ that made me the sickest I ahve ever been in my life. it was not awesome.
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