Tuesday, April 14, 2009

Top Ten Tuesdays: What are we reporting on our taxes?

10) Claiming guy in our man-sized safe as a dependent.

9) Writing off our 401k as a gambling loss.

8) Declaring our occupation as "the Lord's work" so all of our wages can be charitable contributions.

7) Categorizing our octuplets as interest-generating assets.

6) Taking a loss due to seepage on our organ farm.

5) Including a camera, cat, cheeseburger, and bucket on our list of work expenses.

4) Listing our residency as "couch."

3) Requesting bailout for our failed Soapbox Derby Hyrbid industry.

2) Reporting status as, "Married, filing fabulously!"

1) Adding our "spine transplant" under medical expenses. (Democratic Party only)

15 comments:

Jennifer said...

Writing off our 401k as a gambling lossOuch.

Another painfully funny list!

Also, I have not been able to get your Jackson Browne vs dragon song comment out of my head since last week. After reading my high school notes... I can commiserate. :)

Brando said...

Be thankful you only have the lyrics in your head. I have the music as well.

fish said...
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fish said...
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fish said...

In one classic example, one cat is crying, and another is hugging it and saying, "Don't crai. We'll get cheezburger someday." It's sweet and poignant and wistful all at the same time. Life can be hard, it says, and we don't always get what we want, but even as we long for things we may never have, we draw succor from the reassurances of those we love. Sure, it's ridiculous that what the cat is yearning for is a cheeseburger. But the cheeseburger is not really a cheeseburger -- it's a symbol./
/
Somebody please shoot me in the face.

Brando said...

I knew you would enjoy that link, fish.

zombie rotten mcdonald said...

this comment has been eated by zombee.

Vincetastic said...

401K as a gambling loss is correct. Do you know what form that is?

Churlita said...

Fish can haz shot gunn blast.

Jennifer said...

Brando- I'm kind of surprised you don't have a special tea-bagging edition planned for today.

fish said...

Perhaps we can get Digby, Jane, and Atrios to analyze why LOLcats are funny. That would be awesome.

Brando said...

J, too busy to write today, but I think I'll do something with the tea baggers tomorrow. I usually like to do the fake news stuff the day after the real news happens, so I look like real news. One of my proudest moments on this blog was finding someone who linked to my story on Mitt Romney proposing dry humping as a form of teen birth control, and the linker not being sure if I was serious.

Brando said...

What about a series of LOLcats analyzing why LOLcats are funny? How completely meta would that be?

Jennifer said...

Looking forward to both.

fish said...

Brando, like this?