Special supersized edition!
13) Rapid advances in cheese-to-dough delivery systems.
12) Day-to-day food pyramid is more éclair shaped.
11) All these illegal immigrants willing to eat half of what Americans do.
10) Dannon’s new bacon-on-the-bottom yogurt.
9) Climbing rates of telekinesis.
8) School cafeterias replaced by rows of Pez dispensers.
7) Thought we had been going to the gym, but turns out it was our Second Life selves.
6) Coco Puffs gateway to much more cuckoo breakfast cereals.
5) Forced by General Tso to march to buffet for more of his chicken.
4) Scarfing whole Meat Lover’s pizzas just to spite snooty vegan sister.
3) Divine punishment for ancestors’ support of slavery.
2) Hollywood’s constant portrayal of obesity as glamorous and chic…no wait, it’s the jumbo popcorn with extra butter and a gallon of Mountain Dew for just a quarter more.
1) Would find out if it didn’t require getting off the couch.
11 comments:
14. Gym subscription rates.
"Dannon’s new bacon-on-the-bottom yogurt."
Does Pinko know about this yet!?!?
Also, bacon on the bottom sounds more like something Sen. Craig might like. That could just be my Second Life talking. :)
15) Bottled water with flavored calories.
This makes me giggle.
Also, I have to add: 16) Driving to the mailbox.
10) Dannon’s new bacon-on-the-bottom yogurt.
Mmmmmmmm Bacon!
Though it's incontrovertibly sans humor;
#1. Instant Gratisfaction
(I had to try!) {-;
I'm working on a bacon you can snort. Soon to be available at schools everywhere.
17. Bacon wrapped Krispy Kremes. (sweet AND salty)
yer funny.
14) carrying this Heineken beer keg around in my chest.
LOL @ Kathleen.
16) All the "friends" I made in line for The Biggest Loser, um, cattle call.
I love #12. That's so wrong!!
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