Wednesday, August 25, 2010

Top Ten Wednesdays: Why are we protesting the Ground Zero mosque?

10) Refuse to believe that any Muslims are moderate until they convert to Christianity.

9) Don’t want to give radical Muslims a public, observable place to gather, and instead would rather drive them underground where they will be less dangerous.

8) A mosque near the site of 9/11 would serve as a trophy of Islam’s victory over America, akin to introducing your new wife to your cancer-stricken ex-wife.

7) Refuse to let a mosque be built at Ground Zero until they can build churches in Mecca. Also, will no longer be constructing any strip clubs, sex shops, Dunkin’ Donuts, hot dog stands, delis, sports bars, Starbucks, and corporate offices in lower Manhattan until they are built in Mecca.

6) Cannot allow the construction of sites dedicated to religions that preach violence, sexism, homophobia, and porkism.

5) Crying guy on TV told me to.

4) Building a mosque near Ground Zero is as insensitive as letting a white guy drive a rental truck around Oklahoma City.

3) New York is considered sacred ground, as detailed in Paul’s First Letter to Joey from Bay Ridge.

2) Provides a safe, refreshing new way to once again yell at black people in public.

1) Because in the United States, all religious freedoms are created equal, but some are more equal than others.

6 comments:

Jennifer said...

Because although America was founded on religious freedom, there is no mention of a mosque in the Constitution, and therefore, building a mosque... or even a community center... would be unconstitutional.

Hamish Mack said...

And no freedom without representation of baby Jesus inna Manger and Salty Claus. Is all I'm sayin'

Brando said...

Thunder, if they would just wise up and convert, then we wouldn't need to pull out those swords.

Churlita said...

Timothy McVeigh was a Christian too. So, hopefully there aren't any churches near "Ground Zero" in Oklahoma City either.

Kathleen said...

saw a "protest building a library next to Sarah Palin" tweet that made me laugh very hard.

Kathleen said...

saw a "protest building a library next to Sarah Palin" tweet that made me laugh very hard.