Monday, October 26, 2009

Four quarters of pure, unfiltered ugh

Great googly moogly, did the Bears shit the bed yesterday. I could tell by the time the Bengals finished their opening drive it was going to be a long day -- the Bears looked like they were sleepy from a big pasta dinner as the Bengals pushed them around. I did not, however, expect a 45-10 beating that resembled Andy Dufresne running into The Sisters in the Shawshank Penitentiary laundry room.

My brother Tickle and I have a long-running joke about evaluating the Bears play. When the Bears do well, we'll text each other "Super Bears, Super Bowl." When they do poorly, we change it to, "Super Bears, Super Suck." Yesterday I couldn't even muster the first part of that joke. "Super suck," I texted him.

"That should be the title of your blog," he wrote back.

A fine suggestion, but since this is an official NFL blog, I felt I should stay away from "suck" or references to prison rape. So I turned that frown upside down and then slapped that smile on Cedric Benson for my latest Bears post.

Thanks for the Self-Esteem Boost, Bears!

6 comments:

Jennifer said...

As I said previously, I can't believe I'm reading a football blog... it is indeed a testament to your writing.

I saw bits and pieces of the carnage yesterday and it did not compute... at one point I looked at the score and saw 3-3B... my glasses are waaay overdue for a replacement... anyhow, my mind was willing to believe that there was a 3B score possible because 38 made no frickin' sense. I made the mistake of asking Grizzled, who confirmed that there was no 3B in football... that the Bears were just sucking and had forgotten to play defense. :(

Judging from other scores I saw yesterday, a lot of teams forgot to bring the defense...

zombie rotten mcdonald said...

I watched the first part of the game. I couldn't make it to the half, and normally even a half-ass Packer fan like me enjoys a good Bear Beatdown. I felt guilty no matter which way I looked at it, so I turned on an Aliens movie.

And Yeah, Jennifer, the Browns brought a defense, it just wasn't very good yesterday. The Packers kept trying to give them a chance, oodles of penalties, but they couldn't even register a sack against the most sacked offensive line in the NFL.

ifthethunderdontgetya™³²®© said...

Dancing online is easy!
~

zombie rotten mcdonald said...

I have difficulties dancing online.

I keep breaking my computer.

Jennifer said...

Hmmm, I've heard of line dancing, but not online dancing. I wish I knew more, but am tired of searching for such resources over the internet...

fish said...

Online dancing.