Special extra outrageous rumors edition!
11) Refuse to let the president promote a political agenda that will distract from learning conservative family values.
10) Convinced President Obama is just like Hitler...if Hitler was half-black, non-confrontational, and had a lot of Jewish supporters.
9) Read that the president will tell kids the government is requiring “homo time” to be added to P.E.
8) Believe that unless it’s a horrible, violent, tragic event that will likely scar children for life, television has no place in the classroom.
7) Suspect Obama will inform children that if they don’t support liberal causes, they will be extraordinarily rendered to school districts that still allow corporal punishment.
6) Can’t take a chance he’ll mention evolution.
5) Heard Sarah Palin say that Obama’s going make a case for the government to “send Grandma to heaven now” so they don’t have to subsidize her health care later.
4) Afraid Obama will not be able to keep a straight face when he says it takes honesty, moral standing, and intelligence to become president.
3) Do not want children to have direct interaction with the Executive Branch after what happened when Vice President Cheney talked to them.
2) Believe that filling children’s heads with inaccurate propaganda about the role of government is the responsibility of parents.
1) Translated the portion of the speech entitled, “To Serve Your Parents,” and learned that it's a cookbook! A cookbook!