Tuesday, July 14, 2009

What are we being asked during our confirmation hearings?

Special extended that's-mighty-white-of-you edition!


12) Why do you hate white people?

11) Let me elaborate: why do you hate white guys?

10) Given that 106 white men have served on the Supreme Court, do you feel that you're receiving preferential treatment?

9) Related question: if Latinas are so wise, how come they have never served on the Supreme Court?

8) What do you hate more: white men or fetuses?

7) Are you afraid of our Caucasian-ness? Our natural non-heat?

6) If Rush Limbaugh and Pat Buchanan were trapped in an overturned car that was on fire, do you think you would be able to find the superhuman strength to flip the car over and get them out, or would your bias against white men prevent that?

5) Same question, but with Selma Hayek and Penelope Cruz in the car.

4) If you were a tree, would you be the kind of tree that would let a white family build a house out of her?

3) If you had a cat trapped in a tree, would you let a white firefighter get the cat out of the tree? Follow up question: what color is your cat?

2) We noticed that you're wearing a white cast on your ankle. Do you find plaster racist? What about white bones?

1) Why are you so obsessed with race?

25 comments:

ifthethunderdontgetya™³²®© said...

Follow up question: what color is your cat?

Winner!

Did Jeff (Jerry the Mouse) Sessions wear his Klan outfit to the hearings?
~

Von said...

I spent my time watching the news last night and saying "Sotomaaaaayooooor" just like the news casters over and over and over again. Woke up and said "Sotommmmaaaaayooooor" again.
Thank Jebus I live alone.

Jennifer said...

Per-fucking-fect.

Nuff said.

(swearing added for BG's benefit):)

zombie rotten mcdonald said...

can they just confirm her already?

you know it, we know it, Asshole Sessions knows, it, even Limbaugh knows it. Let's move the FACK on already.

Anonymous said...

Muy buen.

Viva Zapata!

Viva Zorro!

Viva Las Vegas!

Churlita said...

Since most Latinos are considered caucasians anyway, it makes me laugh until I cry that all those old White guys feel so threatened.

Kathleen said...

one of your best yet.

Snag said...

13) How much wood would a white woodchuck chuck if a white woodchuck would chuck wood?

zombie rotten mcdonald said...

snag-

none. They would get their Latino woodchuck gardeners to do it.

frickin trick question.

blue girl said...

These were great!

If you were a tree, would you be the kind of tree that would let a white family build a house out of her?

LOL!

zombie rotten mcdonald said...

17A) White meat or dark meat?

Adorable Girlfriend said...

I for one hate white people.

And my kitty's color suggest that I like little old ladies.

fish said...

I think I would fail 6 and 5.

17b) Do you ever consider the use of mayonnaise in a recipe?

zombie rotten mcdonald said...

666) When going to a cross burning, would you wear BROWN robes?

almostinfamous said...

35) What title would you give to The Clash song - (White Man) in Hammersmith Palais

every single point is a home run! well done

zombie rotten mcdonald said...

CALLING BRANDO. URGENT CALL FOR DADDY BRANDO

BRING THE FUNNY TO MENDACIOUS D'S

MENDACIOUS IS GONE, AND ZOMBIES AREN'T FUNNY.

fish said...

Sez you.

zombie rotten mcdonald said...

OK, THIS ZOMBIE ISN'T FUNNY.

ALSO, WE HATE FISH.

Jennifer said...

WELCOME BACK!!!

Brando said...

I am almost back. At TLB's parents right now, driving back to Da UP on Sunday. But I am plugged in again.

Jennifer said...

You're just down the road!!! I saw my stats!

Pffft.

You should have stopped by for a beer. I would have even gone out and bought a Rush CD to play...

Well, maybe NOT!

fish said...

Little did you know sitetracker means she is tracking your every move...

Jennifer said...

I know where you are, fish, and I know what you're doing...

And I have to say... I wasn't surprised, I fully expected that from you.

Jennifer said...

Maybe sitetracker should change its name to sitestalker.

victor said...

I recently came accross your blog and have been reading along. I thought I would leave my first comment. I dont know what to say except that I have enjoyed reading. Nice blog. I will keep visiting this blog very often.
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victor
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