Tuesday, February 17, 2009

Top Ten Tuesdays: How are we changing our retirement plans?

10) Practicing grocery bagging skills for post-retirement employment opportunities.

9) Altering goal of moving to Las Vegas to Leaving Las Vegas.

8) Moving our 401k allocations into more stable Powerball Fund.

7) Using kids' college fund to send ourselves back to college until its safe to graduate again.

6) Investigating tasty new ways to die of a heart attack before the age of 65.

5) Obtaining a fake ID so we're young enough to enlist.

4) Squatting in foreclosed McMansions.

3) Feeding on the pigeons.

2) Getting the food, shelter, and health care we'll need by sticking up the nearest police station.

1) Working ourselves to death so we won't have to be scared about retiring.

12 comments:

Jennifer said...

11) Donating body to science before it's dead... the living cadaver program.

Jennifer said...

Trading in our golden years for cash.

zombie rotten mcdonald said...

17) serfs don't retire

Kathleen said...

grim but funny. A tough line.

Snag said...

zz) Using our bitter tears to water the garden that now provides our sustenance.

Grendel said...

I LOVE no. 3.

Churlita said...

This is so funny, I could cry.

Kathleen said...

I think we are calling those "prosperity gardens", Snag.

Snag said...

Shrub gardens, maybe.

Adorable Girlfriend said...

I considered buying tissue paper at this prices because it's only going to go up from here.

Seriously, I am scared for all of us.

Brando said...

It's funny, I actually got depressed writing this.

almostinfamous said...

this somehow sounds like a prophecy and not a joke...