9) Plus we all know that taxes are an affront to Jesus.
8) Jesus came to die for our sins, and that meant crucifixion. That wasn’t going to happen if He only got a nail in one hand, right?
7) That’s why we have to rescue the American government from its fiscal sins by crucifying it.
6) The biggest way we can reduce our deficit is by cutting entitlement programs, because if there’s one thing the New Testament teaches us, it’s that you shouldn’t just give poor people stuff for free.
5) That goes double for free medical care, which is the work of Satan.
4) And lets face it, this whole mess was caused by the Democrats and their tax-and-spend ways.
3) They are trying to win political points by increasing tax rates and unfairly asking the rich to pay more than their fair share in taxes….
2) When everyone knows that when the rich get richer, everyone else benefits. Isn’t that the Christian thing to do?
1) Besides, everyone knows austerity is for poor people.